For those who do not yet know, our condo is on the market. We’ve had people come in to check it out.
The following are some of my observations: {ahem}
The little key holder that hangs on the door makes the doorknob slide down and become looser. I hate it.
Alright, so it's just one observation so far. I'm sure there are more. I just can't remember any right now.
Onward!
Of the people who call to see the house, here is a category breakdown:
75% do not show up, they also don’t call. These people truly really suck.
Of the 25% who do show up, ½ are late. Very late. They also do not call. They only kinda suck.
The last ½ of the 25% (I don’t do percentages really well, okay?) are on time. Thank you.
Overall, all of these people force me to clean the house.
They also force Dave to clean the house. Well done. I salute you all. You have been able to do something that I can only dream of. You make Dave clean the bathrooms and take out the trash. Without me asking.
Heck, maybe I should call a realtor and say that I want to see the house every weekend.
Hmmmm….. I’ll file that away for more thought.
The place always looks fantastic. Really*!
It does however, remind me that I do not want to leave this place. I love the condo! I admit that I have been sorely tempted to do some subtle things to, well, I wouldn’t say sabotage. I would say perhaps add some “subliminal” message that they do not want to buy.
Here are some of my, umm, ideas**:
1. Remove all air fresheners.
2. On the other hand, place all of the air fresheners from the whole house in a single room. Turn them to high.
3. Place towels on the floor around every door and window opening. Do not explain why they are there. Pretend they don't exist.
4. This is the ideal time to ask for suggestions for more “ideas”. Feel free to post them. Make them tasteful, please.
I can't really think of any more. It's late. I'll be up in about an hour to feed the baby (nine months of this, I don't know how much longer I can take the sleep deprivation) so I must to bed go.
Goodnight.
*This statement is for my mother-in-law who actually owns the condo. *cough-cough* The condo always looks like a model home. You can stop by on any given weekday in the afternoon and would never know looking at it, that a procrastinating husband, exhausted wife and small, messy baby live here.
** Please note that these are only “ideas”. I would never in any sense actually act upon them. Never. They tempt me, I’ve thought about them, but I would never do any of them. I may have come up with the “ideas” and planned how they would work, but still, would never put them into play. Thank you.
